


Needles and Spoons

by Kelandry5



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Addiction, Angst, Depressed Orihara Izaya, Drug Abuse, Drug Use, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Mentions of Rape, Minor Character Death, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-03
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-09-14 14:21:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9185702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kelandry5/pseuds/Kelandry5
Summary: Shizuo finds Izaya in a terrible state in an alleyway and takes him to Shinra. It turns out Izaya is addicted to drugs and Shizuo might be the only one capable of helping him, if anyone even can. Shizaya??(Also available on fanfiction.net and wattpad)





	1. Alleyways

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter has been rewritten!!!  
> I decided to try using first person POV. It's my first time writing a short story in first person so sorry if it's awkward or awful. If it is, please let me know!  
> As always, comments are appreciated and generally lead to faster updates.  
> Thank you for reading!!!
> 
>  
> 
> (Slowish updates...only about once a week)

I looked down at the man in front of me curled up against the wall in the dirty alleyway. If he hadn’t been wearing that fur trimmed jacket, I probably wouldn’t have even recognized him. He was dirty, his clothes were slightly tattered, his body was nothing but skin and bones, and none of his cocky god complex personality was present.

“Flea?” I knelt down beside him and called out his nickname. “Oi! Flea!”

The Flea tilted his face to look at me with eyes glazed over and a hint of something completely out of character. _Fear._

“Izaya?” I tried again in a gentler tone.

“Sh…shizu…..chan” he managed to cough out. Then he broke out into a hysterical laughter.

At first I just stared at him confused. The laugh began to grate on my nerves so finally I slapped him, although not with full strength.

“What the hell Flea! You look like shit and now you’re laughing? Where the hell have you been the last three months?” I yelled just quiet enough to avoid attracting attention from passerbys. It was dark enough out that people wouldn’t see us very well, but they could still hear.

Izaya didn’t answer. He just stared as if he was looking right through me. It was creepy. I mean, he is always creepy, but this was extra creepy.

“Can you stand?” I asked. This time he responded with a hesitant nod. He tried to push himself up with shaky arms only to fall back to the ground.

“Guess not.” He smiled and began to laugh again. I sighed and picked him up, throwing him over my shoulder.

“I’m taking you to Shinra’s.” I waited for protests, but there was only a quiet hysterical chuckle and then silence. I decided it was best to avoid areas with lots of people so we stuck to the alleyways and less frequented roads. By the time I was knocking on Shinra’s door, he was out cold.

“Just a minute!” Came Shinra’s cheery voice. The cheery voice had a cheery face to match when the underground doctor opened the door, but it was quickly replaced with shock.

“What the hell did you do now Shizuo!?” Shinra asked as he ushered us in. I placed Izaya on the couch then pulled out a cigarette and lit it then turned away and went into the kitchen.

“I didn’t do shit. I don’t know what’s wrong with him. I found him in an alleyway acting like a looney bin freak!”

“Did he say anything?” Shinra asked, taking his medical kit from Celty.

“Not really.”

“Shit!”

I turned around to see what made Shinra curse, since he didn’t usually do so without good reason. What I saw was plenty of reason. The doctor had removed Izaya’s shirt to reveal a skeletal frame with multiple bruises, but what caught both our eyes were the marks on his arms, the kind a drug addict gets from the needles.

“Drugs?” I asked as if it wasn’t obvious. Shinra nodded his head.

[Was Izaya a drug addict before?] Celty typed on her screen and showed it to us. Shinra shook his head.

“Izaya may pull some crazy crap…but not drugs….I never thought…..Why?” Shinra looked up at me expectantly as if I might know the answer.

Of course, I didn’t. It’s not like I was buddies with the flea or anything. I hadn’t even seen him in months. I thought the guy had kicked the bucket, although from the looks of things that would happen pretty soon.

“What do we do?” I surprised myself with the question. Why did I even care? I wasn’t his friend. There was just something about seeing him like this that pulled at my insides.

“Could you carry him in there please?” Shinra pointed to the makeshift hospital room. I nodded and carried the flea into the room and put him down on the bed gently.

“I’ll start him on some IV fluids and sedate him to keep him asleep through the night. There isn’t anything else we can do till he wakes up.” Shinra uttered a defeated sigh and got to work. I watched quietly for a moment.

No doubt the flea wouldn’t take to kindly to being brought here once he woke up….at least the old flea wouldn’t.

“Do you mind if I stay?” I asked, surprising myself yet again. Shinra gave me a questioning glance. “He might try to make a break for it when he wakes up.”

“What do you care?” Shinra retorted suddenly his voice full of ice.

“It would be trouble….and it’s not like I want him to die….not really….especially not like this.” And for the third time that night, my words surprised me. Oddly enough, Shinra didn’t seem surprised at all.

“I know. It would actually be a big help if you stayed…if you don’t mind.”

I nodded and settled in the chair in the corner of the room. Shinra bid me good night and I returned the gesture before settling into a light sleep.

 


	2. Realizations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it takes so long for me to update this story. I might switch to writing in 3rd person for at least parts of it which might make it easier.  
> Anyway, I'm not really confident about how this chapter turned out so I hope you enjoy it! It's kind of uneventful....

“You want to tell me where you have been lately?” I asked when Izaya woke up. It was already afternoon. I expected the flea to reply with some smart ass comment and a smirk. I even expected he might try to run. He didn’t do either though. Instead, he rolled onto his side to face away from me and stared at the wall.

“I’m at Shinra’s?” He asked dryly. I nodded before realizing he wasn’t looking and verbally confirmed his suspicion.

“You want to tell me why you were high as a kite in an alley way last night or maybe why you look like hell, though I can guess the last part.” I stated unable to keep my frustration out of my voice.

“Not really.” His voice only carried a hint of his usual smugness.

“Too bad, I wasn’t really asking.” I hadn’t expected him to answer me that easily.

“Too bad. I don’t care,” he paused and turned to glare at me before adding, “….and neither do you…not really.”

 I tried to think of a reply but came up short. I did care, but I didn’t know why, and he would want an explanation if I refuted his statement. If I didn’t give one, he wouldn’t believe me, so arguing was pointless.

The flea rolled over again and stared at the wall. An uncomfortable silence stretched grew. I decided to go let Shinra know Izaya was awake.

“Oi! Shinra!” I plopped down on the living room chair and jerked my thumb in the direction of the room Izaya was in. “The flea is awake. He didn’t tell me anything though.”

Shinra sighed and walked into the room, shutting the door behind.

There were some muffled angry sounding voices, sounds of items crashing to the ground, and a few grunts before the door opened and a pissed off looking flea stormed out and left the apartment although not before nearly falling on his face twice. I looked at Shinra trying to figure out what happened. He looked furious.

“Uh…oi! Shinra?” I called. Shinra sighed and regained his composure. I watched as the doctor walked over and slumped down into a seat.

“That didn’t go as well as I hoped.” Shinra stared as if that much wasn’t obvious.

“Did he tell you anything?” I asked, genuinely curious and a bit worried.

“Hardly, except that it’s his life and he can do what he wants and telling me to stay away from him.”

Celty walked over from where she had been in the kitchen and placed a cup of coffee down in front of me and Shinra then began typing on her PDA.

[What are you going to do? You can’t just leave him alone.]

Shinra sighed again. “I’m aware, but there isn’t anything I can do.” Shinra took a sip of his coffee and looked up at me expectantly. I could see where this was going a mile away and I didn’t like it one bit.

“No” I said.

“You’re the only one he can’t get rid of easily.” Shinra argued.

“He hates me. I hate him. Let him die for all I care.” Except I did care…

“You don’t mean that. If you did, you wouldn’t have brought him here. You wouldn’t have watched him all night. You wouldn’t have asked him any questions. You wouldn’t still be sitting here listening to me. You wouldn’t…”

“Stop.” I growled cutting him off. “Even if I do care, he still hates me. And what do you expect me to do anyway? Follow him around? Glue my eyes to him?”

“Yes.”

“Is that a joke?”

“Not at all. You are strong and you are stubborn. And…” Shinra paused, “he doesn’t hate you. I know. I’ve known him longer than you have.”

“You didn’t know about his little drug habit.” I sneered despite myself and cringed when I realized what I had said. I apologized right away.

“That’s true.” Shinra looked down at his hands making me feel guiltier. “But I know when he hates someone and he doesn’t hate you. He acknowledges you. It’s like the elementary school boy who teases a girl because he likes her. If Izaya hated you, he wouldn’t bother with you.”

I stared open mouthed at Shinra. So basically Izaya is a little kid with a crush? That sounds so stupid…..for a stupid flea….I guess that actually fits. Still, elementary school kids don’t try to kill the girl they like and the girl doesn’t try to kill them too. Then again, are we trying to kill each other? I hadn’t given it much thought before…but if we really wanted each other dead that badly, we would both probably be dead by now.

“Fine.” I heard the words come out of my mouth without really thinking. Nothing about this situation made any sense. I was getting a head ache.

 


	3. Hit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm going to switch back and forth between first person and all-knowing third person for this story. It may not be considered proper or whatever, but if I try to write this entire thing in first person it's going to take the rest of my life! So here you go. This chapter is a bit longer than the last one! Enjoy.
> 
> Sorry for the slow updates!
> 
> Comments are appreciated!
> 
> By the way, I do not use drugs or condone the use of drugs. I used a reference for how to prepare heroin for this part of the story, although Izaya is on a made up drug not heroin (It will be explained later what the drug is and who created it). And then I had one of those moments where I laugh like an idiot because I realize if I went missing tomorrow and the police looked at my internet search history...they would soooooo get the wrong idea...yep...that kind of moment.

No one’s POV

Izaya left Shinra’s apartment and headed back to Shinjuku using the back alleyways. He wasn’t even half way home when he kicked a can on the ground and slumped down against the wall. He buried his head in his hands. Shinra knew. Shizuo knew. They didn’t know everything, but they knew the worst part. They knew Izaya was weak. The great informant lost to some needles and a drug. It didn’t matter how or why. They knew his secret. What was he supposed to do now? Run away? He needed the drugs and he needed to continue working. He couldn’t run away. Face Shinra and Shizuo? Absolutely not! They would laugh at him. They were probably already laughing. The whole town was probably laughing already. In fact, he swore he could hear the distant laughter. They were all laughing at the weak Izaya Orihara. No longer great. No longer a god. He couldn’t even pretend to be a god now. His king was no longer in check. It was check mate now, but none of that really mattered at the moment.

He picked himself up. He needed to get home. He needed his next hit. He was cold, but he could feel the sweat beginning to form. He stumbled and swayed almost blindly. It was a good thing he knew the route well enough to follow it with his eyes closed because that might as well be what he was doing. It had been more than 24 hours since his last hit. The last one had been more than usual. The more one took in a dose, the shorter period of time before the cravings hit. He knew how the new drug was designed. With the size of the last dose, withdrawal was setting in now.

The only important thing right now was getting home, pulling out a needle, and taking his next hit. He was pathetic and he didn’t care.

He didn’t notice the rain beginning to fall and soak through his clothes. He didn’t notice the two kids that ran past him searching for cover. He didn’t notice the taxi that almost hit him or the fact that he hit several buttons before the right one for his floor in the apartment building. He didn’t notice he left the door unlocked or that he was getting the carpet wet. He went into the kitchen and pulled out his kit, a glass of water, and a bag and took them to the coffee table. Ignoring the fact his wet clothes would soak the couch; he opened the kit and stared at the contents for a moment. He pulled out the spoon, syringe, and lighter first. It took almost no time at all to prepare the drug, but it felt too long to the raven haired man.

Quickly wiping the spot down with an alcohol wipe first, Izaya placed the needle into his skin, easily placing it in the vein.

“Finally.” He exhaled as he injected the drug and removed the needle with a satisfied grin. He tossed the needle to the floor and leaned back with a glazed over look in his eyes. It was a fast acting drug luckily. It quickly took over his mind.

He didn’t notice the loud banging on his door or the click that signaled it was being open. He didn’t notice the shouting of the man who had barged in or the worried look on the mans face. He didn’t hear the conversation between the intruder and someone on the phone. He didn’t notice that he was being shaken or that the hands on his shoulders were bruising him. He faintly recognized that someone else was there and he laughed in a rather hysterical giggle.

Shizuo POV

I didn’t make an effort to rush out after Izaya. I probably should have, but I didn’t. I walked casually to his apartment and knocked on the door. There was no answer. I tried the door knob. It was unlocked. That was a big red flag. Izaya would never leave his door unlocked under normal circumstances.

I opened the door just enough to look around until my eyes landed on a head of raven black hair on the couch.

“Izaya?” I called. He didn’t respond. I called a little louder in case he hadn’t heard but there was still no answer, so I opened the door further and stepped in.

The place was overly clean as always. The only light was from the living room lamp and the kitchen. I could see Izaya’s shoulders trembling, but there was no sound. That’s when I knew the flea had done something stupid.

It only took a couple steps to cross the space between the door and the couch. I observed the scene before me. A lighter, spoon, cotton, syringe, and bag of some sort of drug sat on the coffee table. Izaya’s eyes were glazed over and he didn’t seem to recognize I was there.

“IZAYA!!” I yelled and grabbed his shoulders a bit too tightly.

“Shit flea! What the hell!! Snap out of it damnit!” I kept yelling but he ignored me. Quickly I dialed Shinra’s number and waited impatiently for the doctor to pick up.

“Shizuo? Is everything alright? You haven’t even been gone..”

“The damn flea already took something by the time I showed up!” I yelled cutting him off.

“What are his symptoms?” Shinras voice seemed unbelievably calm given the situation but I guess that comes with being a doctor.

“He’s not responsive. His skin is cold but he’s sweating.” I noticed the beads of sweat forming on his forhead and the skin of his neck where my thumb rested felt inhumanly cold. “He’s…”

Before I could continue, there was a burst of hysterical giggles from the flea.

“Shizuo? What’s going on?” Shinra asked worriedly.

“I don’t know!! He just started laughing like a maniac all of the sudden!”

“I’m heading over. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

“Wait! What am I supposed to do with this idiot until then!?”

“Watch for any changes in his condition. If he lays down, make sure it’s on his side. If anything happens, call me.” Shinra hung up and I stared at the still laughing Izaya in front of me. This was already off to a bad start……


	4. High

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah...finally updated this!  
> Hope you enjoy.  
> Comments appreciated.

Shizuo’s POV

Once Izaya’s laughter died out, the only sounds left were his uneven breaths and the rain pounding against the large windows. Speaking of rain, Izaya was drenched. I decided it was best to get him in some dry clothes, but that was easier said than done. He refused to cooperate, or maybe is unresponsiveness was due to the drug, so dressing him was like dressing a doll. I had to do all the work myself, but at least he was light. I mean, really light. He was always a frail looking guy, but not this tiny. Was it related to his addiction?

Addiction?

Izaya was an addict. That moment was the first time I actually processed that piece of information and what it meant and it seemed so unreal. Izaya, the great informant, the man who acted like god, was a drug addict.

I sighed as I grabbed a blanket from the linen closet and wrapped it around his shivering body. The shivering didn’t stop so reluctantly, or maybe it wasn’t all that reluctant, I pulled him to my side and tried to warm him up. At least the hysterics seemed to have passed. I’m not sure how long my patience would have lasted dealing with that maniacal laugh.

 

Shinra’s POV

“Celty Dear, I have to go.” I called to my lovely Celty as I grabbed my medical kit.

[Is everything ok?] She typed into her PDA. I shook my head with a worried frown.

“Izaya took something, probably whatever he was on before. I have to go.” I paused as I thought of something. “Actually, if you’re free, could you give me a ride? It would be faster.”

[Sure.] She typed quickly and we left.

When we arrived, I knocked on the door and Shizuo yelled for us to come in instead of answering the door himself. It worried me that something might have happened in the time it took to get there so I rushed in, but my fears were unfounded. Instead, I was left surprised. Shizuo was gently caressing Izaya wrapped up in a blanket. The latter was clearly out of it though and definitely high.

“What’s going on?” I asked indicating the position the two were in and how….almost sweet….it looked.

“He was drenched from the rain and cold so I changed his clothes and wrapped him up.” Shizuo replied with a shrug. “He hasn’t really changed since the call except the hysterics or whatever have died down.”

I nodded accepting the answer and set my bag on the coffee table. I glanced at the clutter already on the glass surface and tried to discern what Izaya might have taken. After a moment, my eyes fell on a small bag and I picked it up to examine. It didn’t look like anything I was familiar with so I set it back down and pulled some basic instruments from my bag.  

“Shinra, how ovely to shee you.” Izaya slurred as I checked his eyes for responsiveness to light. “Is not nice to poin brigh lights shin peoples size.”

“Izaya, can you tell me what you took?” I fixed him with a serious glare.

The raven-haired man grinned almost wildly as a shiver passed through him. “Wha I took?” He asked innocently.

“Yes. The drug Izaya. Do you know what the drug is?”

“Whaever ares you talkin bout silly Shinra?” He cocked his head to the side and reached his hand in front his face flapping it in the air.

I sighed. Getting answers out of him wasn’t going to be easy. I reached for the bag and held it up. “I’m talking about this Izaya. What is it?”

“A bag.”

“I can see that. I’m asking what’s in the bag.”

He shrugged.

“Tell him what’s in the bag Flea!” Shizuo growled impatiently.

Izaya looked at the blond incredulously before giggling. “You’re sosilly Shizu-shan.”

“Izaya, I need you to focus.” I tried again.

“Focus pocus!”

[I don’t think this is working.] Celty interrupted by shoving her phone in front of my face. I nodded. She was right.

With a sigh, I packed up my bag and stood. “Shizuo, can you take him to his bedroom.”

“What about….”

“If you have a way to get him to talk seriously, I’m all ears, Shizuo.” I groaned in frustration.

“I don’t.”

“Then we wait.” I replied and moved to the kitchen. “I’ll make us some tea. Don’t let him rest on his back.”

“Yeah, okay. Should I stay in there with him?”

“Do you trust him to be alone?”

“No.” Shizuo admitted.

Shizuo’s POV

Izaya was still giggling like a silly school girl when I took him to his bedroom, but at least he didn’t resist. As I put him down, I wondered what to say to him, but by the time I made a decision, he was already asleep.

“Well that was fast.” I murmured under my breath. One minute he was acting ridiculous and making silly hand gestures and the next he was out like a light. At least it was quiet. Quiet and kind of cute.

Yes, I know thinking he was cute was inappropriate for the situation, but his small figured was curled in on itself barely taking up any room on the giant bed and his pale face had this goofy but possibly most sincere smile I’ve ever seen him wear. I sighed and lay down on the other side of the bed letting my fingers run through his still wet black locks. My last thought before I drifted off to sleep was about how nice this was…..or how nice it would be…if what led to it was a different set of circumstances.


	5. Arrangements

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh...so not the most exciting chapter ever but I would really really appreciate feedback/comments!  
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy and all!

Izaya’s POV

I didn’t know how much time had passed as the high faded away. The patter of rain on the window felt like drums banging far too loud in my head and I groaned. The room was mostly dark with only the city lights casting a dim glow over the room which was enough to rummage through the drawer beside my bed and find the pain medication. I shook a few from the bottle and swallowed them dry, grimacing at the awful taste. I wasn’t sure how many I took, but it didn’t really matter. What was a few more drugs in my system anyway?

I lay my head back on the pillow and closed my eyes as I waited for the pain to dull. After a few minutes, I realized something was off. I might have been high earlier, but I was pretty sure Shizu-chan, Shinra, and Celty had come over earlier yet I didn’t see them in my room. They could have left, but I doubt Shinra would have just walked out and left me here alone even if I would have preferred that he did. But if he wasn’t in the bedroom….

“Shit!” I cursed to myself as I realized he could be anywhere in the apartment opening any number of drawers and cabinets. I was smart enough to have multiple stashes throughout the apartment of course and he probably wouldn’t find all of them, but I would rather he didn’t find any.

As much as I wanted to rest a while longer, I threw my legs over the side of the bed and stood up shakily. My body seemed more exhausted than I realized and my head spun. I staggered a bit trying to find my balance. Not eating the past several days was taking its toll, or maybe it was the drugs. I couldn’t tell what was what anymore and I hardly had the strength to care. I needed to find Shinra and get him out of here. A quick glance at the clock told me I had time to get rid of the nosy doctor, rest a bit more, and still get some work done before I needed my next hit.

I took a few deep breaths and waited for the dizziness to subside before making my way to the door. Just to be prepared, I gripped my switchblade in my pocket before carefully opening the bedroom door a few inches. The hallway and rest of the upstairs was dark, but there was a light downstairs and I heard the faint sounds of talking coming from the living room.

Last I checked, Celty couldn’t speak and I doubt she would have a mans voice if she did. The whispers were too quiet to tell whose voice it was, but Shizu-chan was the only logical possibility for the owner of the second voice….I hoped. He had showed up earlier if I remembered correctly so maybe he was still here? Maybe Shinra thought he needed some muscle to back him up or something…..just more trouble to deal with.

Sighing, I tip toed to the stairs and looked over the railing. Sure enough, Shinra was sitting in my living room with Shizu-chan and Celty drinking coffee and whispering and making themselves at home.

“You can go now.” I growled grabbing their attention.

Shinra flinched and looked up with that stupid sheepish smile of his. “Oh….Izaya….you’re up…”

“Well I do have work to do.” I replied trying to avoid talking about the elephant in the room. “If you would be so kind to leave and let me work in peace, I would appreciate it.” I hissed.

“Izaya…..”

“Please leave.” I begged even letting a hint of my desperation leak into my voice.

The three looked at each other and for a moment I thought they were going to agree. Then Shizu-chan got up and stalked up the steps and I knew I wasn’t getting out of talking, at least not as easily as I hoped. Shizu-chan roughly grabbed my arm and dragged me to the living room. Perhaps I could have resisted and maybe I could have even dodged, but my head hurt and my hands shook. My chances of winning a fight against the monster were probably at an all-time low. Hell. I wasn’t sure I could win a fight against Shinra at that moment, so I resigned myself to being thrown around like a rag doll. After he threw me onto the couch, he took up a stance which I could only interpret as an attempt to block my escape. I let my body slump against the couch and took a breath to prepare myself before looking at Shinra. The doctor was obviously struggling to decide how to start. While waiting, Celty got up and brought me a cup of coffee which I gratefully accepted and took a few sips.

Shinra cleared his throat after a minute of seeming to search my appearance. He took a sip of his own coffee then set his mug down and interlaced his fingers under his chin. “Izaya, I think we need to have a talk.”

“I disagree.” I replied with disinterest.

“Izaya…..please.”

“There is nothing to talk about, Shinra.”

“Oi! Flea!” Shizu-chan growled. “You’re shooting up drugs in your damn veins and you look like hell! Obviously there is something to talk about! Just let Shinra help!”

“I told you, there is nothing to talk about. I would appreciate it if you all left.” I growled in return.

It looked like Shizu-chan was going to start yelling and maybe even attack so I set my cup down and gripped my blade. I didn’t need to though. Shinra stood and held up a hand in front of Shizu-chan and I watched the two make eye contact and seem to have some wordless discussion that I didn’t really care about. Shizu-chan nodded and Shinra shifted his gaze to my eyes.

“Celty and I will leave for now…..but Shizuo is staying here.” He explained.

I scowled and prepared a protest, but Shinra wasn’t done speaking so I bit my tongue as he continued.

“You don’t have to tell me what’s wrong right now, but I won’t have you dropping dead from an overdose or choking on your own damn vomit.”

I sighed and nodded. I supposed I could live with that…maybe. It wouldn’t last long anyway. There was no way Shizu-chan and I could survive each other’s presence for more than a few hours. Either one of us would be dead or he would leave, and I was willing to bet on the latter even though I honestly didn’t care at the moment.

 My response satisfied Shinra and, after taking Shizu-chan aside and speaking to him for a few minutes, he left. Celty gave me an awkward hug and followed after.

And that’s how I ended up alone with my mortal enemy in my apartment late one night.

And neither of us looked particularly pleased.


	6. Soup

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry!!! This has been on my computer for weeks and I forgot about it. Sorry about that! Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

Izaya’s POV

With more effort that I care to admit, I pushed myself off the couch, grabbed my coffee mug and headed to my desk. I still had work to do. Turning on the computer, I heard Shizu-chan shuffling his feet, but paid no mind till I realized he was suddenly in front of me and glaring as if he meant to kill me with his eyes. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair wishing I could just disappear, but I couldn’t.

“What do you want?” I asked without bothering to hide my annoyance. At first, I didn’t think he would even reply given the way he adverted his gaze, but I never could predict him the way I could anyone else. Instead of turning away as I expected, he refocused his glare on me again.

“What do you think you are doing?” He growled.

“Um…working?” I replied as I began typing away in a chat room. What the hell did it look like I was doing?

“You should rest….” He started before changing his mind. “Actually, you should eat. You’re skinny as fuck.”

“Fuck isn’t a noun.”

“Whatever.” Shizuo huffed and turned towards the kitchen. “When was the last time you ate?”

“Friday.”

Shizu-chan stopped mid-way to the kitchen and whipped his head around to glare at me again, but it was more curious than deadly or angry this time. “That’s almost a week ago….” He muttered.

I shrugged still focusing on my work. “I can’t keep much down so I just don’t bother.” I muttered under my breath.

“I’ll make some soup.” He offered and continued into the kitchen.

I froze. It’s not that I minded the idea of soup so much as I minded him searching through my cabinets and stumbling upon my main stash, assuming Shinra hadn’t found it and disposed of it already. I shot up from my seat and half ran half stumbled my way to stand between Shizu-chan and the kitchen before realizing how dumb I must look….and how suspicious. I internally cursed myself but it was brief. The sudden quick movements were too much. The previously dull headache became a pounding one and I swayed barely able to maintain my balance.

“Uh….ne, how about I help?” I offered knowing it was a weak cover. Even muscle-for-brains wasn’t dumb enough to not see through my façade. Still, I plastered my usual grin on my face and held my ground standing as steady as I could manage. I boldly met his gaze with my own in a silent challenge, but he didn’t accept.

“I already know you have a stash in there, Flea. You don’t need to lie.” He averted his eyes and for a moment I thought I saw a pain in those yellow-brown orbs.

Not knowing how to respond, I just stood frozen in place pursing my lips together in a defeated frown. He didn’t move either and the silence dragged on. However, the standstill lasted barely more than a minute before dizziness overtook me and I fell. The only thing keeping me from face planting into the floor was the two solid hands that, rather than just holding me up, lifted me off the ground.

“Wh…what are you doing Shizu-chan?!” I demanded, although it didn’t come out nearly as harsh threatening as I intended.

Shizu-chan waited until he placed me back in my desk chair before answering. “Look. Just do your work. I’ll make the soup. You do have soup, right?”

“Y..yeah…usually keep a couple cans around somewhere in the pantry.” I whispered.

“Good. Then just do your work and stay seated. I promise I won’t touch the drugs…at least for now.” He added the last part a bit hesitantly before turning back to the kitchen.

Honestly, I was a bit surprised by how gentle he was being and the fact he was agreeing to let me keep my stash, at least for now according to him. I wasn’t going to argue. I didn’t even have it in me and I really did need to do my work. With a long drawn out sigh, I turned my focus back to my computer and began sorting through various chat rooms and emails and typing up messages.

Shizuo’s POV

If it had been up to me, I would have thrown the drugs out hours ago, but Shinra told me to leave them for now. Apparently, if we interfered too much, Izaya would just be more careful about hiding his stash and his actions making it harder for us to keep an eye on him. His words, not mine. Like I said, I wanted to throw the drugs in the trash and I wanted to give the flea a good smack to the head. Actually, I didn’t want to smack him in the head, but only because he looked so freakin pathetic and fragile at the moment.

I figured the best thing I could do right now is make some food. Walking into the kitchen I located the pantry and opened it. Not surprisingly, there was little in there. However, there were a few cans of soup stashed in the back corner of the second lowest shelf. I pulled out the first one which was chicken noodle soup.

While the stove heated up, I occasionally glanced over at the raven head. Funny how I went from wanting to break his fucking neck to making him chicken soup and trying to keep him alive. I even found myself worrying about him, and not just because Shinra asked me to. I actually cared if the flea lived or died.

When the soup finished warming up, I poured some into a bowl and set it in front of Izaya on the desk.

“Eat.” I ordered.

He regarded it wearily as though it might be poisoned even after I assured him it wasn’t. Either I was reading him wrong or he didn’t believe me.

Unfortunately, I’m not a patient person and I also refused to leave his side till I saw him eat the soup. It was taking far too long in my opinion though. I wanted to force it down his throat, but at the same time, I was afraid. Even a normal human could probably break him in half if they weren’t careful. If I put too much force into so much as poking him, he would probably turn to dust like a vampire in sunlight.

That is what happens to vampires right? Or werewolves? Fairies? AHH I don’t know. It’s an illogical thought anyway! Then again, I’m acquainted with a dullahan. Why can’t vampires and werewolves exist too?

Except that’s not important now or any other time. Taking a deep breath, I was about to repeat my order again, but I didn’t have too. Izaya picked up the spoon on his own and started eating. It was hesitant, but that wasn’t important either. Although, I would soon understand why he didn’t want it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback/comments appreciated!


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